Traveling is fantastic. If it is. Traveling is the best school. If it is. Traveling is the only thing you buy that makes you richer. If it is. Traveling is a rose garden. Hey, well no. It is not exactly so and today we are going to reveal to you what travel-bloggers do not count.
ADVENTURES
I know what you think: we get up in a different, adventurous and beautiful place every day, we risk our lives, we don't know what routine is, we live crazy life. Mmm No. We are not war reporters. Nor Indiana Jones. Not all at least. We sure don't.
And the crazy life? He stayed in the times of the uni. Crazy we have only the head. And if we make more than one photo "jump" the next day we have laces.
If it is true that many days we get up in extraordinary places, most of the time a place, to deserve the adjective of extraordinary, has to have one thing: wifi. Without wifi we are nobody. A travel blogger without Wi-Fi is like a sky without stars, a man without a belly (it was said that, right?), A crepe without a nutella, a fashion blogger without a mirror ... or as the Blasco said as a man without a head or a glass without base!
Sometimes it gives us to escape and go to the deserted forest / mountain / beach in hermits plan. Although if by some strange phenomenon in our solitary refuge we catch an open Wi-Fi network, we lose our reason and celebrate it more than those of “yosoyespañolespañolespañol” in the World Cups.
And we update the facebook. Clear.
Wondering where the nearest wifi is
MISADVENTURES
I teach you (almost) everything that is beautiful and 'purplish'. However, the hostel's bathroom does not. Not that our mothers look at him, give him a patatús and forbid us from entering the house before disinfecting with bleach and turpentine. And that photo with the Bromo in the background? How nice, right? Already but I do not tell you that to get up there we almost lost a lung and stepped on three hundred poops of horse or donkey (it was night and we are not sure about the origin of the feces).
Yes! Laugh, laugh that you have 5 poops attached to the flip flops!
THE PICTURES
Sometimes they ask us why we go out little in the photos. Informal response: 'ehhh is that the places are sooo beautiful that they deserve all the prominence.' Absolute truth: apart from the fact that I am a bit 'princely' and if we add the fact that when we travel we do it with the minimum luggage, well, we always go out with the same clothes!
The travel bloggers are light years away from fashion bloggers: they stand up handsome, energetic, well dressed. We with dark circles, slime trunks, electric hair, the same shirt yesterday (and maybe tomorrow). No, no, certainly the picture of the panorama is better, believe me!
Hey, we won't be fashion bloggers but we have our style huh!
IBIZA & CO
When we are on the local bus - which we sell you sooo cool and authentic - with 10 cm free to support our butt, that to be minimally comfortable we would need the quadruple of space, with a chicken that falls like there is no tomorrow, the Laotian karaoke set a thousand decibels, a road that has more holes than an emmental, a driver who won the card in a game of poker and an uncle who looks at you and laughs in your face during the 8 hours of travel, we begin to think that, perhaps, the idea of going to Ibiza-Sardinia-Mallorca-Punta Cana or I know, Benidorm, was not so bad.
That moment when, along with the coke, they bring you a stick to scare the monkeys ...
And also fuck! Do we miss ham, our bed, friends, ham, family, croquettes, ham, have I already said that?
The next time a travel blogger tells you that traveling is fantastic, don't envy him. Now you know that behind the 'fantastic' hide chicken poops, radioactive waters, wifi-addiction, ham withdrawal and much more.
... or when to enter the mosque they make us put a plastic basket on the head!
But you know that all these calamities, travel bloggers, we love. We are a bit masochistic yes, and luckily: imagine a world made only by fashion bloggers ... pufffff what a bore!
